Another piece of my heart
Every now and then I need to get stuff out. I will probably bore you with this for a while now and I'm sorry.
Yesterday I took a decision that was hard. No more talking to him before I find myself in this mess. I'm going to make it, I'm sure I will and I know that when I'm ready he is there to be my friend. That should make my heart calm. But somehow it doesn't, at least not for now. Its a battle to see him on Facebook, its hard to not write to him. But I hope that if I get past these first crappy days it will feel much easier. But its going to take some time. I'm still angry and sad, thats the worst thing... I can't seem to make my mind up about my feelings and that is killing me. I was angry, now I'm more sad.
But lets face it, I'm going to try to put my heart back together again, piece by piece and that takes time. Because right now its in DC and I know that I shouldn't leave it there.
Yesterday I took a decision that was hard. No more talking to him before I find myself in this mess. I'm going to make it, I'm sure I will and I know that when I'm ready he is there to be my friend. That should make my heart calm. But somehow it doesn't, at least not for now. Its a battle to see him on Facebook, its hard to not write to him. But I hope that if I get past these first crappy days it will feel much easier. But its going to take some time. I'm still angry and sad, thats the worst thing... I can't seem to make my mind up about my feelings and that is killing me. I was angry, now I'm more sad.
But lets face it, I'm going to try to put my heart back together again, piece by piece and that takes time. Because right now its in DC and I know that I shouldn't leave it there.